Each year I like to reflect and see my growth, what I have accomplished and be thankful for everything that is to come. The year 2018 definitely was the year for some serious growth, strengthening experiences, heartache, success, failures, and you bet learning to be more patient. The one thing I’d like to be honest with is though; this year didn’t go according to my business plan, it indeed turned out far better than I could have ever imaged!
I like to set goals for myself, some of them I share, and others are personal, but one of my goals I wanted to focus on this year was to be more open and personable with you all. This is something I have struggled with because one, I don’t want everything to be focusing around me, but at the same time, many of you can relate to my craziness! Motherhood has open a whole new leave of crazy plus running a business from my home. Sometimes I lose focus and forget to balance the two. I know with this year things are going to be so different. The balance between the two is going to be extremely important for both my family and my clients.
I know many of you are badass moms who run a household maybe even work too. You get the craziness surrounding motherhood. You also know how lonely it can be, especially when you spend a good portion of your day juggling your kid’s schedules, your own work duties, household chores, etc. Your day is run continuously by others, and you are always left doing for someone else. Time for yourself is like far few and between. That is me. My days are filled with ensuring the oldest gets to school on time, the current youngest doesn’t get into anything, everyone is fed, bathed, happy and content. Life is hectic, but honestly, I have no idea what life would be like without my family. So as much as I like to complain about it….. I wouldn’t change a thing! <3
Life is about to get a whole lot crazier!!!
In just two weeks or less… hopefully not more… my little family of four will become a family of FIVE! We are so overwhelmed with joy and cannot wait for our newest addition to the family to arrive. It has been what seems like a long road to get here, but we can soon say we have made it!
The one thing I wish I had been more open with you all was about my miscarriage, my pregnancy, the depression, anxiety and the guilt I have carried. It has been so lonely holding it all in keeping it bottled up inside thinking that I just need to get over it. When in fact I should have been more open as so many women have struggled with one or more of the things I have been dealing with myself. It’s hard trying to be open in a world that can be pretty downright cruel, heartless and mean to others, but I know the community that I have surrounded myself within the last three years has given me more hope in humanity than ever before.
This year I hope to be more open and share my life with you more. I want you to see me as a person rather than some CEO. I am not a robot sitting behind a computer with no emotions; I am real! Sometimes I forget to put myself out there. It’s hard when you aren’t always comfortable with sharing the experiences that have shaped you for fear of judgment.
All I want is to help other women who have been suffering know they are not alone. That they should NEVER feel they cannot share their stories. Our stories are what help others get through some difficult times. I for one have been happy to find a blog or a post that shares REAL and RAW emotions from women who are struggling but still trying to KICK ASS! We are not alone even when we feel we are. This is the hardest thing to learn especially in a world where your anxiety rules your thoughts far more than your own brain and heart does. I hope I can open up and help others. If my story can help someone than I have achieved what I have set out to do.
So cheers ( ice water ) to 2019! I hope you all will find the real and honest me to be inspiring to share your own stories and struggles. We as women can conquer whatever the world throws at us, but sometimes having a team of women to do this with makes it far more enjoyable journey than doing it alone…
Images were taken by Lauren Mckeown